The Beast Within

A child's anger is unlike an adults. It's less of a quick snap or slow burn, and more of a wild rage. Anger can bring a child to a place where they can't hear or reason, can't stop themselves, can scarcely even catch a breath to howl anew. It's hard for adults to really understand the force of those emotions, but some authors get it and have portrayed it admirably in their work.

I'll bet your child can relate - which also makes these books a great way to talk to them about this powerful emotion at a calmer time. Your child might feel more understood, and you might even just be able to work out some strategies for communicating when your child feels this way and for how you can help him or her return to earth. And who doesn't want that?

When Sophie Gets Angry, Really, Really Angry, by Molly Bang

This critically acclaimed book was one of the early entries in this category of books that look unblinkingly at how out of control a child's anger can really get. In it, bold, swirling colours illustrate Sophie's wild emotions perfectly as she works through her anger and lets it out. Bang has a real feel for how a strong emotion can carry a child to a different place, and she has chosen a powerful way to express it in this book.

That Makes Me Mad!, by Stephen Kroll, ill. Christine Davenier

Nina explains in this book the things - the many things, some of them seemingly inconsequential to a grown-up, and some familiar, frustrating things - that make her mad.Each instance is illustrated in a little vignette that owes something to comic book sequencing and perfectly capture the expressions and postures of an irritated child. A lot of the circumstances will look familiar, as they happen within the family setting, which makes this all the more approachable. And in the end? Being able to tell her mom about how angry she is, in the end, turns out to be a big help. I like this book a lot - it reminds us of our children's feelings and how even in a warm, loving home, they are bound to get trodden on, and gives a nice, reassuring way to come back together as the storm passes over.

Angry Dragon, by Thierry Robberecht, ill Philippe Goossens

This book may be of particular interest to parents of boys, as the two above both feature girls. In this book, a boy turns into a dragon, taking on an angry red colour, fiercely hurling angry words and stomping about until he can return to being a boy and reconcile with his parents. In terms of illustrating how a child often has to feel their anger all burned away and spent before they can accept a parent's comfort, this is spot on. It also shows the kind of imagination that some children have, which I always appreciate.

If You're Angry and You Know It, by Cecily Kaiser, ill. Cary Pillo

This early reader turns the familiar song If You're Happy and You Know It into a song about dealing with your anger. Illustrations set up common school situations that might make a child feel angry, while the song suggests a technique for showing your anger, ie. "you're angry and you know it, stomp your feet." The suggestions are designed to let off steam, for the most part, and while we might not be thrilled with kids going around stomping, it certainly beats some of the other responses that young children lean towards in moments of rage, so for that, I quite like it. The book wraps up with a verse that assures children that they will then be happy once again. A nice tool for showing more appropriate ways to demonstrate anger, especially for those who are frequently frustrated.

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Just the Way You Are

We want our children to be confident, to find their own niche, to feel good about something they love to do. That thing is not always the expected or conventional, though. These stories each celebrate doing things your own way, in your own time. They'll have you singing along with Frank (or Syd), "I did it myyyyyyyy way!"

The Fabulous Song, by Don Gillmor, ill. Marie-Louise Gay

This fantastic Canadian duo have collaborated on some of my very favourites, and this is no exception. Frederic's mother names him for Chopin, and is convinced he will be a musical genius. Despite this, her many attempts at getting him playing various instruments meet with failure after failure. It isn't until Frederic notices a conductor that he finds his niche, and makes his hidden musical talent known by bringing together his extended family in perfect harmony. It's funny, it's got great art, and the message is uplifting without being hammered home. Perfect.

Omar on Ice, by Maryann Kovalski

Omar loves pictures and wants to be an artist - unfortunately, drawing is not exactly his forte. He feels terrible until he goes skating, something he loves to do, and forgets all about it. But he feels even better than okay when a classmate points out the figures he has unwittingly drawn with his skates - he is an artist after all! A rousing book celebrating the joys of doing what you love - differently.

Leo the Late Bloomer, by Robert Kraus

Leo didn't do any of the things the other kids did. His father began to worry, but his mother had faith that he would catch up on his own schedule. And one day, proving both that not all children are the same and that mother's intuition is spot-on so often, Leo did indeed "bloom," suddenly able to do everything his parents could hope for. This classic is easily overlooked, as Kraus' drawing style is not flashy, but this and his other works are wonderful, and should not be missed.

The Mixed-Up Chameleon, by Eric Carle

A chameleon who feels envious of the qualities of several other animals takes on the characteristics of each, becoming so discombobulated that when a fly flies by and he is hungry, he doesn't know how to catch it until he wishes he was himself again. This simple lesson on appreciating who you are and the things that you can do is rendered in the instantly recognizable art of Eric Carle. It has the added benefit of presenting animals and colours, and comes in a board book as well.

Also in this vein, see Alexander and the Wind Up Mouse, Frederick, and others by Leo Lionni. My beloved Kevin Henkes books also often contain a note of this - see Chrysanthemum, Chester's Way, Owen, and Jessica.

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

When Grandparents Fade

Children love their grandparents. Grandparents are, after all, a wonderful part of a child's life. Who else can spoil and love thm without having to be the disciplinarians and taskmasters? It's a wonderful thing for them to be able to have a close bond. My grandmother was one of my favourite people, just as it should be, and memories of grandparents can be some of the best ones even half a lifetime later.

But how to explain when things start to become harder? If the wonderful person that is grandma starts to fade from view a little, if grandpa becomes a little strange or forgets who his own beloved grandchild is? It is a difficult thing for an adult to understand and accept when the person they know and love starts to disappear while their physical self is still here, the disconnect heart-wrenching. For a child, it is confusing and a little scary. Helping them to appreciate what is left, to continue to show their love for the person that was, and to become more comfortable around the new reality is perhaps the best we can hope for. A little help in discussing such a difficult thing is out there, though. Here are a few titles to get you started on that tricky path.

Wilfred Gordon McDonald Partridge, by Mem Fox

Wilfred lived next door to an old people's home, and he loved the people who lived there - most of all Miss Nancy. When he overheard that she had lost her memory, he set about finding out what a memory was so that he could help her find it. Each of the people he asks gives their own interpretation, and he finds objects that fill those niches, bringing them to her in the end. As she looks through them, they bring up a collection of memories she thought she had lost. This story is sweet and warm, and beautifully told be the incomparable Mem Fox. The illustrations are quirky and filled with warm colours that add to the feel of the book. Simply lovely, and while Miss Nancy might not be Wilfred's gandma, it's a very nice way to talk about memories and the loss of them, and shows a lovely way to help reconnect with an older person.

Mile-High Apple Pie, by Laura Langston and Lindsey Gardiner

This grandmother is a special grandmother - one who was always a bit of an eccentric, and quite wonderful for it, but is now living with the family because she is starting to forget. Margaret, her grandaughter, doesn't believe her parents when they tell her that one day, grandmother will forget everything, even who she is. She helps her remember, finding her slips and quirks even a little charming at times. One day, though, grandmother does forget, and Margaret is upset. The book relates a bit about her confused feelings, but stresses that while her grandmother might not always remember her, she does love her, and as Margaret sees that for herself, she feels better about it and goes on helping her out. Sweet and quirky, with illustrations to match, this is a nice, gentle way to talk about a grand's memory loss.

My Grandma's In A Nursing Home, by Judy Delton and Dorothy Tucker, ill. Charles Robinson

This is an older book, and feels it, being printed in black, white, and sepia only, but entirely worth getting over the bland appearance for. In it, Jason recounts what it is like to start visiting his grandma in her new home after she had moved out of his family's home (she has Alzheimer's and needs extra care, it is noted). At first, he, his grandmother, and his mother are all sad about the move, and the nursing home seems a strange, not-so-nice place filled with slightly scary old people, but as they all grow more accustomed to it, they relax and find some joy and a new friend or two. Told entirely from Jason's perspective, this book skips being too informational or teachy, and instead hits the feel of the visits right on. I do hope that they will update this one and re-release if someone notices this hidden gem.

This last book is in fact about a deceased grandparent, rather than one who is undergoing the changes of aging. It may more properly go, then, with the Books on Bereavement, but I thought it would be a good one to know about in case you are looking to prepare a child for this eventuality, as well.

The Grandad Tree, by Trish Cooke, ill. Sharon Wilson

This book is simple and lovely, using an apple tree in the yard as a starting point to remembering when they played under it with grandad, In short, nicely framed sentences, it talks about their grandad's life and the seasons and life cycle of the tree, and notes that both will last forever because they are remembered. It's a lovely sentiment, but the illustrations are the perfect touch to make the whole thing beautiful, and the overall feeling is sweet and wistful without dwelling heavily on death or falling into a lot of sentimentality. Wonderful. (On a side note, I also love that the book features a family of colour without ever making a point of that fact. I'd love to see that happen more!)

Find these and lots of great stories about happier times with grandparents at your local public library!

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Making a Spectacle of Yourself

I first wore glasses when I was a mere three years old. Having had a three-year-old now, I'm not sure how my mother ever kept them on me. In fact, I would guess that a lot of children have some difficulty adjusting to glasses. They are, let's face it, a sort of weird thing to have on. You see them and feel them on your face, and for someone accustomed to being unencumbered by them, not so great. Now, of course, there are extremely cute specs for little kids, far removed from the ugly plastic things of the 19mumblemumbles, but still, hard to get used to for some.

So we parents, we emphasize the need for them, we keep after them, and all the things that parents must do. But putting a positive spin on them is something that we can turn to authors for a little help with. Need some books to help put things in perspective or help the bespectacled future look a little brighter? Here you go. You're welcome.

Baby Duck and the Bad Eyeglasses, by Amy Hest, ill. Jill Barton

Baby Duck does NOT like her new eyeglasses. she worries that they might fall off, and that they look ugly, and begins to feel sorry for herself. Grampa, who also sports specs, tests her limits and she discovers that she can do all her favourite things with them, still, AND read clearly. All good. This installment in the cute baby duck series takes the typically reassuring tone of these books, with her always-understanding Grampa making things okay. I like how he gets her. And while these books hover on the edge of too-cute, they usually come down on the right side, and certainly sit well with young kids of toddler age.

Spectacles, by Ellen Raskin

A young girl keeps seeing strange things everywhere, until her parents are sure she needs glasses. She is not convinced, but they take her to pick some anyhow, and she gets some terrific ones from the fantastic selection available. Suddenly, things look different... at least, as long as she keeps them on. This book is great fun and features Raskin's signature quirky style. It is (so sadly!) out of print, but I mention it because if you can lay hands on it, is is well worth the search. It was a favourite of this specs-sporting child, back in the day.

Glasses: Who Needs 'Em?, by Lane Smith

This frequent Jon Scieszka collaborator takes on this topic alone in a typically offbeat picture book.It treads familiar territory - coming to grips with the need for glasses and realizing they aren't so bad - but Smith adds his own brand of humour and his angular but slightly fuzzy, dark-toned illustrations. What sets this book apart from the others here is that it has, I think, much greater boy appeal than most books on the subject.

Glasses for D.W., by Marc Brown

One of the side benefits of series books is that you can use them to tackle a number of topics, and here Marc Brown uses his phenomenally successful Arthur series to talk about glasses. D.W., it seems, wants glasses just like Arthur, and is pretending she can't see. She thinks they would be cool! This is lightweight, to be sure, but the different, more positive perspective could be a nice change from all the angst that can surround them.

Robin's New Glasses, by Christine C. Jones, ill. Ji Sun Lee

When Robin goes to get her new glasses, she is nervous, and wondered if things would change. They do, in fact - for the better! She scored some cute new rims in her favourite colour, so she loves how they look. Better still, she can see everything! This is a very simple little book, but her upbeat delght with her new specs is refreshing, and the young girl herself rendered in simple line drawings that keep this cute, but not overly so.

Bumposaurus, by Penny McKinlay, ill. Britta Teckentrup

Once a dinasaur was born so near-sighted, he was named Bumposaurus for his tendency to run into things. After a series of misadventures and mistakes culminates in his nearly getting eaten by a T. Rex he mistook for his mother, his loving family decides to take action. Enter Grandma, who lets him try on her glasses and opens up a whole new world to the little reptile. Cute and sweet (but not icky sweet), this little guy shows what a difference clear sight can make.

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

There's a Potty Goin' On Around Here

Ah, potty training. Feared by parents who haven't been there yet, subject of parenting books galore, and known to drive grown men to the very brink. I was lucky in this regard - Pumpkinpie was on the case before I was really even worried about it. Even so, I employed a book or two, in my usual manner, to help explain things to her, to show her other kids in action, and to give us a talking point. Now I can't tell you how to go about potty training your child (sorry), but I can tell you about a few good titles to help put forth the suggestion.

There are a, um, boatload of board books and other small volumes on this, many split into gender-specific boy and girl books. In the library, board books are not organized in the catalogue, and therefore cannot be requested on hold, so I won't give you suggestions for those here, except to say that if you are looking to buy one, I did really quite like the Dorling Kindersley (publisher) board book entitled My Potty Book for Girls, which I took home to read with Pumpkinpie. (ISBN for easy finding online: 0789448459, cover image so you know you've found the right one if you're looking, since board books can be tougher to locate and this one doesn't really have an author to be filed under.)

No More Diapers for Ducky!, by Bernetter Ford and Sam Williams

This is a cute, newer (2006) book in the field, and features drawings that are sweet, but not saccharine - a balance that can be hard to strike. When Ducky goes to Piggy's house to play, Piggy is busy on the potty, so she amuses herself for a while as she waits. And as she waits, her diaper becomes cold and wet and not so comfy, until she wriggles out of it and decides she's going to make the bold move to potty usage with her friend. How successful thsi first trip is, we don't know, but the book is a nice one, and uses my personal favourite among potty training methods - peer pressure. If that works for you, bring this one home.

I Want My Potty, by Tony Ross

Fans of the Little Princess have a go-to book on potty use here, as she decides she is sick of diapers, but has some adjustments issues with potty use initially. Soon she got used to it, and agreed that the potty was indeed "the place." Even so, even a potty-trained princess can have an accident now and then when she is too far from the potty, it turns out, which is a nice way to address that such slip-ups are a part of the learning process, not a major flaw in the learner.

The Potty Book for Girls/Boys, by Alyssa Satin Capucilli, ill. Dorothy Stott

This duo of small, rhyming, gender-specific books makes for a ncie introduction to pottying. In it, a child is comfortable with diapers, but when a box arrives and it is a potty, s/he is willing to give it a try. Accidents happen, so do times when s/he needs to sit for a spell. Still, his/her parents are encouraging, and all involved are proud of the eventual success, which is celebrated with phones calls to grandma and the purchase of new underwear.

My Big Boy / Girl Potty Book, by Joanna Cole, ill. Maxie Chambliss

This small book starts out by setting up the similarities between the main character and the reading (read-to) child, so that the child may relate to him - clever. It asks questions along the way to involve the child, encouraging them to discuss their own experiences or guess what is happening along the way as the boy gets a potty and tries it out. He doesn't have immediate success, but after a few tries, he does, to his parents' great delight. The child goes to pick out underpants, but still wears a diaper at night for a while, making for reasonable expectations. The books also show that the child has an accident when he forgets, but that it is not a big deal. It ends on a note of encouragement: "You can learn to use the potty, too. Then won't you be proud of yourself!" The boy version of this duo mentions also the boy's father teaching him to pee standing up. These are simple and straightforward, but create a nice environment of being supportive without pressure. I quite like them, in fact.

Try pairing these wtih a silly story about potty use, like Andrea Wayne-von-Konigslow's Toilet Tales to lighten things up, too.

Find these and more great resources at your local public library!

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

God Is In the Picture Books

Misterpie and I really haven't discussed how we will approach the topic of faith with Pumpkinpie. I was raised with no religious education at all, while his family were church-goers, but he did not continue on his own steam, so it is not something that we make part of our daily life, by any stretch.

Still, it is an important part of the lives of many, a major force in the world today and in the past, and something that I think speaks to a child's wonder about the world around them. It's not something I want to ignore or dismiss, however awkward I find my own unplumbed feelings. Being without a real denomination of my own, though, I am interested in talking in broader terms about the aspects of religion that I think are common across a number of major faiths, and that seek to make us better people. This is about the depth that I am comfortable with myself, and I think it leaves the topic open for further exploration as she grows older.

It also means that, in looking for picture books that address god in these sort of broad strokes, I can be inclusive of a multitude of diverse beliefs, and that these titles can be of use or appeal to people from a wide range of backgrounds. That being the case, and it being harder to find things that are not specifically "Christian" or "Jewish," for example, I thought I would share some of the books I've found that can serve as nice openings to discussing religion gently through picture books at a child's level.

A note: If you are looking for books that explain a particular faith or ritual, please do go to the children's section of your local library and ask for help or browse in the 200-299 section, for we do carry books on topics particular to a variety of religions and beliefs.

Bagels From Benny, by Aubrey Davis, ill. Dusan Petricic

Benny's grandfather makes the best bagels anywhere, but he won't accept thanks for them. Why not?, Benny asks one day, to be told that bagels are made from wheat, and wheat comes from the world, which was made by God, and so God deserved the thanks. Benny thinks about it, and decides to do that by offering Him some of the bagels. He asks his grandfather for some each week, sneaks into the synagogue, and puts them in the holiest of places, where God must live. When it is time for temple, they are gone - God must have eaten them! After a few weeks, it is discovered that a poor man has been coming to the synagogue and believes that God is giving him the bagels to feed him. He promises now that he has found a job, he will help others in turn, and Benny's grandfather, initially upset at what looks like sacrilege, tells Benny that he has indeed thanked God, for he has made the world a little better by this result to his actions. This is on the face of it, a quintessentially jewish tale, but the appreciation for God's work and the helping of others are aspect of many religions, making this lovely story highly transferable in terms of the lessons of generosity, gratitude, and faith that it imparts.

Big Momma Makes the World, by Phyllis Root, ill. Helen Oxenbury

Essentially a retelling of the week of creation, Big Momma, baby one her hip, creates light and dark, water and sky, and so on. As the week goes on, she adds the flora and the fauna, and as she is just about ready to be done and return to the chores of keeping her own house, "she figured she better finish things off in one big bang" that creates all the other little details except for one important one - some people to keep her company. By the end of the week, she is ready for a rest, so she turns over the care of this new earth to the people, but she keeps an eye on things as she goes about her business ever after. A cute retelling, this one will irk literalists, but might appeal to those who want to share the story of creation with a newer, feminine twist. It does have a certain cute, warm, motherly appeal, and I can see how a mother creating things would make sense to a young child, too.

Giant, or Waiting For The Thursday Boat, by Robert Munsch, ill. Gilles Tibo

McKeon, a giant, is angry that St. Patrick chased the snakes, elves, and other giants out of Ireland at god's behest, and wants to pick a fight with god. At last, he is told that god is coming on the Thursday boat. A small girl arrives, and watches as a parade of boats arrive, carrying a rich man, an important man, and a soldier, all of which turn out not to be god. The girl mollifies McKeon out of his anger, until the next day, when she tells him that St. Patrick has gone to continue his work in heaven. McKeon joins him, and the two seek out god to sort out their differences. They find there the little girl, who tells them that they are each doing their jobs, and that they must find a way to get along. There is, after all, plenty of room heaven. This book was very controversial when it came out, for its portrayal of god as a young girl, and is a definite departure for Munsch, though it features some of his hallmark storytelling chops. I can't say I found it a terrific book, but I do like the point it makes about living with people's differences.

What a Truly Cool World, by Julius Lester, ill. Joe Cepeda

Not for those who take their religion and creation myths too seriously, this vibrant picture book featuring an African-American cast of characters (god, his wife, his secretary, and an angel) strays quite a ways off, to humourous results. The fact is, the angel Shaniqua thinks earth looks a little boring, and has no trouble sharing this with god, who reluctantly agrees to make some changes to the drab green, brown, and blue world he has created. Together, he and Shaniqua add flowers and butterflies through the power of singing down colours onto the earth, and bring beauty to the world. A fun bit of fluff, this one.

Hot Hippo, by Mwenye Hadithi, ill. Adrienne Kennaway

There are dozens of stories in our folk and fairy tale collections about how chipmunks got their stripes, elephants got their trunks, and so on. But rarely do these actually involve a deity. When Hippo is hot and wishes to swim in the river, however, he goes straight to the god Ngai, who told the fishes to swim in the sea and the animals to walk on land, and makes a request. Ngai is protective of his fishes, so hippo promises to show him that he is not eating them, and from this is born many of the hippo's characteristic behaviours. I like this one for the care Ngai takes of his creatures and for the way he interacts with hippo, considering his promises until they can come to an agreement. Also lovely are the soft yet vibrant illustrations filled with warm tones that perfectly suit the hot setting.

Whaddyamean? by John Burningham

As much about the environment as religion, this book begins with the premise that god made the world, and upon coming back to check up on it, is disappointed with what he sees. The two people he finds awake (as he'd put everyone into a deep sleep so they wouldn't see him) are little children, and he tells them to go forth and remedy the ills of the world, invoking his name. They do so, and when they encounter resistance, tell the people that god told them to spread this message, and people comply. By the time god comes back to see the changes, the world is a better place. This one is mostly, I must say, a commentary on the state of the world and why it is messed up, but gives a nice message, too, that god cares about the world that he is said to have made.

Find these and other amazing tales about the world at your local public library!

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

School Starters

8My daughter is starting school. In just a couple of weeks. She's a pretty adaptable kid, if she knows what's coming and what to expect, so I've been doing some preparing with her. In the spring, our school, as most do, had an introduction session where she saw the classroom and met the teacher. She saw the coatroom, the bathroom, the class pets, the puppet stage, and so on. That helped. So did the table of snacks. (Hey, she's four...) We looked around the school. I talked about how the teachers knew that those really big kids could seem a bit intimidating for the first couple of years, so the kindergarten kids would have their own door and playground just for them, and we took a look at them. I talked about how she would still go to daycare and play with her familiar friends, but that she would get to make some new friends here, too. I told her I thought we would be able to take the classroom pet home some weekend when the teacher noted that they would be looking for weekend stays for her. We remind her of these things now and then, when it comes up. So we've talked a lot. She seems ready-ish.

But kids assimilate information in lots of different ways, and I have, as I often note, found that reading a story that illustrates a situation can be especially helpful, as it shows another child in the same situation doing just fine, even if they are worried at first. It validates a child's concerns and feelings in a way that my preparatory speeches can only do to some extent. So besides walking by the school now and then to remind and reinforce what we have learned so far, we are bringing some school home to the story chair in our current picture book selections.

Heck, I may even spring for some new school supplies to help ramp up the excitement - especially if I can find some of the great selections from the new Back To School Guide over at Playdate friends Cool Mom Picks! C is for check it out ...

Wemberley Worried, by Kevin Henkes

Wemberley is a worrier. She worries about everything, even though her parents and grandmother try to cajole her out of it. But her biggest worry was coming - she was starting school. Her list of concerns hits right on the money as far as little kid worries, but when she arrives, her perceptive teacher introduces her to another girl, with whom it is apparent she has much in common. Though shy, the two become fast friends over the morning, and she has such a good time, she forgets her major stressors of the morning. A nice relatable tale for an anxious child from the master of sweet but not sickly sweet or over-simple.

Jessica, by Kevin Henkes

Another Kevin Henkes book (yes, I know, I love him, but these really are apropos), this one tells the story of Ruthie, who has an imaginary friend. The two are inseparable, so when her parents think "Jessica" should stay at home when she goes to kindergarten, Ruthie is worried about how she will fare. Jessica, in fact, comes with her and helps her through the first part of the day, until another girl asks to be her partner in line, and Ruthie doesn't know what to do. Turns out, though, that this girl is also named Jessica, and soon enough, Ruthie has a real best friend, which is even better.

Off to School, Baby Duck, by Amy Hest, ill. Jill Barton

Baby Duck is nervous before her first day of school, dragging her feet through getting ready to go and along the walk to there. Her parents' encouragement is not helping her much, nor is her unbuckled, flapping shoe. When she gets to school, though, her beloved grampa is waiting. Grampa is a staple in these stories as the adult who understands where she's at and helps her feel better, and this book is no exception. Grampa suggests she sing a song, buckles her shoe for her, points out some of her strengths, and introduces her to another child and the teacher, asking some of the important questions about school on Baby Duck's behalf. By the end, Baby Duck is not feeling so afraid or alone, and skips in happily. (A mother can dream...)

Ramona the Pest, by Beverly Cleary

Pumkinpie and I started reading this old favourite this summer, as I've been easing her into chapter books this year, and it has been quite a hit. I remember Ramona being a favourite of mine as a child, too - she was not the kind of obnoxious brat you find in some early readers, but was just cheeky enough to be doing all the things you kind of wished you could... Cleary really gets young kids, and hits the right notes of feeling both brash and scared, making Ramona is compellingly relatable. The short episodes also make for nice shared reading, and we often break a chapter into two or three nights, depending on the length of each small event in Ramona's life as a kindergartner. My only complaint is that our newer edition has a new illustrator, too, and I loved the old Alan Tiegreen illustrations. Apparently, even classics are not immune from so-called "progress."

Miss Bindergarten Gets Ready for Kindergarten, by Joseph Slate, ill. Ashley Wolff

This book sees 26 children getting ready for school in the morning, interspersed with their teacher's preparations. What she's up to is not described, exactly, but shows a lot of the kinds of activities that the children will see in the room, so it's a good one for explaining what to expect, as well as showing other children getting exited. Although this series is not my favourite, it also shows a lot of the other big events of kindergarten, so as your child gets into the swing of things, you can use the same teacher to introduce field trips and 100-day celebrations, too.

Kindergarten Countdown, by Anna Jane Hays, ill. Linda Davick

This book is a one-week countdown by a very excited little girl. She thinks about what she will do in kindergarten and how she will behave, and she gets her gear ready to go (some of which won't apply to half-day kids, but still, exciting!). The computer-drawn illustrations seem a bit flat to me, but then that is rarely a style I love. Luckily, the jaunty rhymes and girl's raw giddiness is contagious and saves this book. I think I'll be bringing it home for that last week myself.

A Place Called Kindergarten, by Jessica Harper, ill. G. Brian Karas

The animals anticipate Tommy's arrival with snacks and neck scratches as usual on a day when he does not arrive... The dog tells them he's gone to "kindergarten," wherever that is. The animals worry throughout the day, thought they try to act calm. When Tommy returns at the end of the day on the same big yellow bus that took him, he rushes in to the animals, dispensing the customary snacks and pats, as well as letter knowledge and new songs! He is excited and happy, and the animals join in his delight, wondering as they later go to sleep what he will learn the next day. This book is obviously aimed at a rural child, but the care of the animals and the boy's joy are so lovely, I would take it home anyhow, just for the warm and positive feel of it.

Kindergarten ROCKS!, by Katie Davis

A young boy is about to start kindergarten, and is a bit nervous - or rather, he claims, his stuffed dog is nervous. His older sister helps him think about the things that he, er, his dog is nervous about, answers his questions, and gives him coping suggestions (for his dog). When he gets there, he discovers some good surprises, like a nice teacher, an old friend, and lots of fun activities. At the end of the book, his dog is lost - he's had so much fun, he's left him somewhere, and then panics - but once his sister helps him find good old Rufus, he returns to a positive opinion of his day, exclaiming, "Kindergarten Rocks!" I like that this book pictures a boy (it seems that fewer do), and that the boy's voice is pretty believable - his projecting onto his dog to appear fearless himself is something that kids do, for example. I also like that his sister helps him out. My only quibble is the inclusion of lunch, as few kindergartens are full-day. Still, for those who are, it could be a nice touch.

Look Out, Kindergarten, Here I Come!, by Nancy Carlson

A young mouse is super-excited to be starting his first day, and his mother has to remind him of each step of getting ready. On the way there, he and his mother talk about the things he will do when he is there, givng a good summary of what to expect. When he arrives, however, he falters momentarily, wanting to go home, before his kindly teacher offers to let him look around and he decides he'll be okay after all. This mouse doesn't express any concerns about his experience beyond this one moment of doubt, making the book seem a bit overly simplistic, but the overview of what will go on in kindergarten is a good one for people with children sturdy enough in nature for the excitement to ring true.

Look for these and other great school-themed stories at your local public library!

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Re-Visiting Picks Past

After quite some time writing Pick of the Litter columns, first for MommyBlogsToronto, and now for the awesome new Playdate, I have covered a fair bit of territory, topic-wise. Every once in a while, now, I run into a book that makes me think, Oh! I wish I has seen that one when I wrote about... Well, there are always new things to write about, so I hate to reprint the whole column with the new additions, but I thought I'd refer back and offer up a few of the things that would make good add-ons to some picks of the past.

Gardening

This is the Sunflower, by Lola M. Schaefer, ill. Donald Crews

This cumulative, rhyming story about a sunflower that feeds the birds, who then spill some seeds, which in turn grow into a patch of sunflowers in the same garden that grew the first flower. A note at the back identifies a host of songbirds, as well as giving some sunflower facts, while Crews' trademark bold illustrations make the whole thing a great book for sharing with kids of a wide range of ages.

The Carrot Seed, by Ruth Krauss, ill. Crockett Johnson

A little boy planted a carrot seed. His mother said, "I'm afraid it won't come up." His father and brother doubt it, too, but he has a quiet faith in his seed, and waters and weeds it anyhow until one day, his patience is rewarded. This book is simple as simple can be, featuring drawings by the fabulous illustrator of Harold and the Purple Crayon, and is a great way to remind kids that patience may be tough, but it is worth it, and is especially necessary in gardens.

See more great gardening books in the original post, here.

Twins

Hello, Twins!, by Charlotte Voake

Voake, herself a twin, writes a simple and cute book about herself and her brother as children, though it is not told quite that way. Instead, she introduces us to Charlotte and Simon, who are not alike at all. Despite their very different ways of doing things (which read almost like a book of opposites), the twins love each other as they are. I have been a fan of Voake's for some time, and while this book is even sparser than most of hers, it has the same breezy, slightly sweet style that I love in her work.

Find other titles for two in this post.

All That Jazz

This Jazz Man, by Karen Ehrhardt, ill. R. G. Roth

Set to the tune of This Old Man, this fun and funky counting book highlights the sounds of jazz, and many ways that music can be made, from the snapping of fingers, through numerous instruments, and right up to the conductor. By the time we have met all ten, "these jazz men make one great band!" Notes at the end introduce the jazz legend associated with each of the players, for those who want to tie this to real-life musicians.

Find other swinging titles in this post, from deep in the archives.

Imagination

I Wished for a Unicorn and

A Sea-Wishing Day, by Robert Heidbreder, ill. Kady McDonald Denton

I love a good example of children playing games of the imagination, losing themselves in a world of their own making, rather than surrendering to manufactured realms of television of being entertained by electronic toys. It's a great thing for a child to build that creativity! This pair of books features of child of ambiguous gender who goes on adventures in her (?) own backyard with her dog - exploring fairy tale worlds in one, and going to sea (running into pirates, even!) in the other. It's a bit like Backyardigans without the commercialness, in fact, in the fact that the backyard disappears, and other surroundings take shape, only to melt away at the end, as the child returns. Wonderfully fun romps, these books are given great shape with Denton's typically jaunty illustrations.

Find more great flights of fancy in this post from last summer, here.

Bereavement

The Purple Balloon, by Chris Raschka

This simple, lovely book is specifically written for terminally ill children and the friends and family who love them. It is based on an observation by psychologist Elizabeth Kubler-Ross that across many cultures and faiths, children who draw their feelings about their impending death often draw a free-floating purple or blue balloon. Working from this point, Raschka has illustrated the ill child as the purple balloon, and the others around him or her as balloons of other colours. The extremely simple text addresses how difficult it is to talk about dying, the many people who try to make dying easier, the support to be found among family and friends. Good help can make it easier. There are also some short notes for children about how they can help a friend who is dying in simple ways by continuing to be a friend, for those children who are reading this book to understand another's illness better. I love the simplicity of this book, a little gem that addresses a tough topic with sympathy, but without overexplaining.

Find more books on this topic in this post, from deep in the archives - my very first Pick.

There are always new titles to find, even for us pros!

Check your local library often for treasures new and newly discovered.

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Princesses With Less Pink

My girl has become a princess freak. Me, not so much. I never really was that kind of girly girl, and often, I find the original takes on fairy tales a bit gruesome or scary for her to need just yet, while the modern takes on them frequently make my skin crawl a little. So I tend to tell her my own version, somewhere up the middle, for many of the classic stories, or work hard to find a version that works for both of us.

Still, I like the subvert it a little, partly for my own amusement and partly so she sees you don't have to take this stuff at face value. Not everyone has the same dreams, sometimes those dreams turn out to be less terrific in reality, and sometimes, you just have to be able to laugh. Some of these books are about that sort of approach. Some of them just show a princess with more going on than average - a princess who saves the day is not your standard pink-spangled fare, but it certainly makes me way more willing to let princesses be the fantasy of choice, when princess does not necessarily equal passive.

For all the other moms who hate the princesses who primp and wait for their prince, here are a few you can turn to to show there are different models out there.

The Paper Bag Princess, by Robert Munsch, ill. Michael Martchenko

This is, of course, the best known alternative princess, and an early one. She's still great, though, and a lot of fun. Kids love this story of a princess who has a bad day, in which she loses everything, including her prince. Donning the only thing she can find - a most unfoufy paper bag - she sets out to save him, outsmarting a dragon in the process. But is he grateful? Oh, heck no. And she sees right through him and his finery, and leaves him where she found him. Good girl.

Princess Smartypants, by Babette Cole

Smartypants just wants to be left alone to live with her animals - a vile collection of monsters if ever there was one - but because she was smart and pretty, all sorts of annoying princes keep turning up to try to marry her. Eventually, she sees she will have to do something, sets some tasks that scare most of them off, and thinks she is done with the hassle. Not so - Prince Swashbuckle is pretty smart himself, and manages to keep up. Until she turns him into a toad, that is, and gets to live happily ever after - with just her pets for company. Fans of Cole's typically quirky but hilarious style will not be disappointed by this one.

The Balloon Tree, by Phoebe Gilman

The princess in this Canadian favourite is a young girl whose father (the king) goes away for a while and leaves her nasty uncle to run the kingdom, despite Leora's trepidation. Sure enough, the evil archduke plots of takeover as soon as the king is gone, and it is up to Leora to save the day, with the help of her wizard friend's spell. With persistence, smarts, and will (as well as that helpful magic), she alerts her father to the danger in time for him to return home and set things to rights. Pumpkinpie loves this one, and the illuminated style makes it a beauty.

The Gypsy Princess, by Phoebe Gilman

In another, lesser-known tale by Gilman, a young gypsy girl dreams of becoming a princess, quite in love with all the trappings. When she enchants a real princess and is taken to the court, she finds that the excitement wears off quickly, and she begins to chafe under the weight heavy gown and tight slippers and the lack of anticipated magic. Indeed, her old life seems magic now, and one morning, she slips out, sheds her newly acquired princess-y ways along the road, and finds her way back home, where she belongs. It is something of a country mouse, city mouse scenario, but works nicely to show that even the most glittery and appealing things are not always what they seem.

Atalanta's Race

This myth is one of many parts, and far too dense for a preschooler if you look at the versions found in the mythology section. Indeed, in those more complete versions, she also allows herself to be tricked by her suitor with help from Aphrodite), and loses the race by one step. This surprised me a bit, raised as I was on the Free To Be, You and Me version, but I do still like that she insists on choosing her suitor by her own method, and then opts to lose to him when she finds that she wants him to win. Still, in suggesting this one, I am pointing you towards the young-child-friendly Free To Be version, which can be found in the big book of that title, along with tons of other great stereotype-busting skits, poems, and songs. There is plenty of time for the lnoger, meatier version as they grow older.

Princess Stinky-Toes and the Brave Frog Robert, by Leslie Elizabeth Watts

Lunetta is doomed from birth to be eaten by a dragon when she turns ten - a deal with a witch, as you might have guessed. At age nine, she begins to despair, but meets a knight-turned-frog who promises to help her, since he can only break his own spell by saving a life. He instructs her not to bathe. Not ever. So that by the time she turns ten, the princess now known as Stinky-toes is a pretty foul little creature - so foul, the dragon won't touch her, and eats the witch, instead. And Robert? He turns back into a knight, and proves himself worthy by telling Lunetta he likes her even more for her ability to choose the unpopular option. In the end, she takes a bath, to everyone's delight. No, no marriage. She's only ten, after all, and this isn't actually the middle ages. Funny, with a few little nods to fairy tale classics, this is a great tale of turning the princess thing on its head and a new Pumpkinpie favourite. The only problem? If you have a reluctant bather, this might give her the perfect reason to avoid the tub. Just in the spirit of fair warning and all.

Princesses Are Not Quitters!, by Kate Lum, ill. Sue Hellard

A trio of princesses are bored, and decide to trade places with the palace servants one day. By early afternoon, they are worn ragged by their chores, but do not want to be quitters, so they keep going through the many afternoon chores and just as many evening chores. By midnight, they fall into bed exhausted, and sleep late the next day. Seeing the servants at work, then, they know how their backs and hands and feet must ache from working hard ay in and day out, and decide to change the work conditions in the kingdom. To pick up the slack that this would leave, they take part in the work themselves - they are, after all, no quitters. This group of most un-princess-y princesses is a delight, with cute illustrations of gorgeous old-style princess gowns, generous spirits, and a lesson in persistence given with a fun twist. I love it.

Willa the Wonderful, by Susan Milord

When she is researching a class paper on her occupation of choice, Willa, a young pig, decides to try out first-hand what it would be like to be a fairy princess, her dream job. She dresses the part, and tries all day to make good things happen, but it's harder than she expects, and the results are less than satisfying. It's not until the end, when she rescues a classmate's younger brother, that she manages to both accomplish a good task and earn some recognition for her attempts. Turns out it's not so easy to be a proper fairy princess, but helping other people is worth it. Which, when told in a cute story like this, is a moral I can swallow, being both sugar coated and not hammered down my throat.

Once Upon a Cool Motorcycle Dude, by Kevin Hawkes with additional illustrations by Carol Heyer and Scott Goto

When a boy and girl are assigned to write a fairy tale together, they have very different ideas of how things should go, and as they take turns telling it, it takes a few twists along the path. As the two start to become competitive, the results get pretty funny, and in the end, they have cobbled together something they (mostly) agree upon by teaming up their heroes. So what happens? Well, once the princess's ponies are getting stolen by an evil giant and several princes are defeated by him, a cool motorcycle dude takes over security at the castle and is beating the giant, but meanwhile, the princess buffs up and joins the fight, and the two scare him off together before they fall in love and get married. This illustrations in this are part fairy-tale pink, part awesome-action-hero dark, and part cartoon-style renderings of the arguing kids superimposed over the illustrated action. It's hilarious, and has great appeal for an older kid - I'd say most kids would be at least 6 years old before they'd really get it, maybe even older, but when they do? They'll love it. In fact, I may have broken the quiet of a late afternoon at the library lately by cackling madly as I read it. Maybe.

Princess Backwards, by Jane Gray, ill. Liz Milkau

This is a short and simple stroy about a princess who lives in a crazy land where everyone does everything backwards, but because she does them the opposite, they think she is backwards. Got that? But one day, her "weirdness" comes in handy, because while the others are running around backwards, tripping, and trying to shoot arrows over their shoulders, she strides right up to the dragon and throws a bucket of water in his face to put out his fire before he can burn up the drawbridge. And the dragon? Is thrilled. His mouth has been burning, you see, and he couldn't do anything about it! So the dragon is no longer a threat, the princess has saved the day wtih her strange ways, the two become friends, and she teaches the archers to shoot frontwards, making them far more efective. All in all, turns out that different is good. Not the most shining example of storytelling, but definitely short and simple enough for the younger princess enthusiast to enjoy, and containing just enough silliness for the older ones.

Princess Furball, by Charlotte Huck, ill. Anita Lobel

A young princess is lonely, having lost her mother and being largely ignored by her father. Her nurse, however, taught her well in both the more practical arts of the servants and the finer ways of a lady, such that she grew up to be both clever and resourceful, as well as beautiful. This all came in handy when her father wished to marry her off to an ogre -she demanded bridal gifts that she thought he could not produce. He did, however, and at that, she ran off. She soon found herself a servant to the servants in another king's house, but cleverly endeavoured to reveal herself slowly over time to the king until he fell in love with her, and was happy to "catch" her at her game. This ends more conventionally, wtih a marriage, as it is indeed related to a few traditional folk tales, including Cinderella, Catskin, and Many Furs, but Furball's willingness to work hard and her resourcefulness make her stand out in a crowd of standard princess tales.

Find these and other fantastic fairy tales at your local public library!

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Baby Talk

Here at Playdate, we are anxiously awaiting the arrival of our editor's new bundle of joy. HBM has been working on through it, and is counting the minutes at this point, if she hasn't already delivered by the time I hit publish. She's not alone, either. There are plenty of other bloggers out there who, right this very moment are gestating siblings or settling in with their new additions, and that's just among the ones I know.

Well, I can't offer these wonderful mamas much personal help, but I can offer them the help I know how best to give - suggestions for books about new babies to share with the older siblings. Books that can help explain what's happening or about to, books that share the joy of a new baby, but also books that acknowledge the many and varied feelings a sibling is bound to have. There will no doubt be a lot of talking about these things ahead, and sometimes, a book can be a useful tool to help guide the discussion, start the discussion, or anticipate questions to come.

So in honour of all these spring babies, here are a whole flock of books, both story and informational, to help the ball roll smoothly. Best of luck, ladies!

The Answer Books

The New Baby At Your House, by Joanna Cole, ill. Margaret Miller

This book starts with an extensive note to parents about this big change in their older child's life, before it goes on to speak directly to the child. It adresses a whole host of topics from discovering that a mother is pregnant to her hospital stay, and what a newborn looks like, umbilical stump included (blech!). It talks about what a baby can do (including a breastfeeding mom - yay!), how a sibling can help out, and how it might make the sibling feel to see the baby getting so much attention. It also talks about the joys of being bigger, about how families need to teach babies, and about how someday, the baby can become a playmate. This book is thorough, speaks in language that is accessible but not patronizing, and asks occasional questions, while stressing how much parents love their big children, too. Miller's photographs are simple and plentiful, showing lots of different families, so that most children will see themselves somewhere in here. This may be one of my favourites, although it seems like it would work best once the baby arrives, or at least is pretty darn close to joining the family.

A Baby's Coming to Your House!, by Shelley Moore Thomas, ill. Eric Futran

This book talks about different ways that babies come, all the stuff that they come with, and the way the relatives and parents might act. It talks about how to hold the baby, how the baby will act, what it will eat, and how the sibling can help. Thomas acknowledges that siblings will get less attention, but stresses that parents will still have time for them, and that brothers and sisters will help teach the baby everything it will know. It ends on a note of teaching the baby about family and love, and suggests that this will make the sibling happy to have the new baby. While this isn't my very favourite, to be honest, it does cover a lot of the things a sibling needs to know, with nice photographic accompaniment, so I would still say it is a useful one and include it.

What to Expect When Mommy's Having a Baby, by Heidi Murkoff, ill. Laura Rader

Angus the answer dog gives answers to a lot of the basic questions that kids will have, in terms that even young ones will understand. Questions include where the baby is, how it gets there, how it grows and eats, what it does in there, why mommy might not feel well and visits the doctor so much, and how the baby gets out. Much as I was prepared not to love a book that starts out with a little mascot, I found it very accessible and straightforward. It uses language like "uterus," "sperm," and "vagina," while not going into graphic detail, which makes for a nice balance of proper but appropriate information. The illustrations are also fun, with a picture book feel, but not too cute. The only things I didn't love were the absence of information on c-sections for those who have them, and the fact that the book ends at birth. Luckily, there is a followup: What to Expect when the New Baby Comes Home, by the same team.

The Story Books

Mothers Are Like That, by Carol Carrick, ill. Paul Carrick

While this book ostensibly talks about what mothers are like and what they do, it also serves to show the ways in which new babies need to be cared for and will grow. The illustrations show animal mothers caring for their young - including nursing them - and ends on an image of a human mother tucking her baby into bed, making the connection between mothers of all species. It's sweet and gentle without straying into the icky or saccharine, and a nice way to start to talk with children about what it's like to have a baby.

Where Did That Baby Come From?, by Debi Gliori

A bewildered sibling ponders whence the new baby, complete with editorials about how weird it is, and about not getting another, or perhaps returning it. It's kind of funny, or at least a light way to acknowledge that a new baby might not be an immediate hit. In the end, though, the baby's cry arouses a different instinct, and the sibling wants to help. Following that, a magical baby laugh makes the sibling want to repeat whatever created it, and suddenly, the wonder of babies starts to sink in. Cute, but not sappy.

Julius, Baby of the World, by Kevin Henkes

Before Julius was born, Lilly was the best big sister in the world. But after he actually appeared, things changed. She was not pleased with the new interloper who had her parents so captivated, and she showed it in unpleasant ways. No matter how hard her parents tried to make her feel special, she behaved terribly towards the new baby, and ultimately, spent quite some time in time out. It didn't help when relatives showered him with attention at his party - until one cousin says disparaging things about him, and rouses Lilly to his defense. And she finds that when she points out all his good features, she actually means it. It goes without saying that I would love this book, because, well, Kevin Henkes, but I also love the brutal honesty about Lilly's behaviour and reactions. This is no sweet, glossing-it-over version of a child's reaction, but that is Lilly - outrageous, over the top, and totally putting it all out on the table. Ya gotta love that, even while you're horrified.

Baby Talk, by Fred Hiatt, ill. Mark Graham

The new baby's crying seems to be telling Joey's mother what the baby wants, but not Joey. His mother offers him chances to help out, but he is not interested. His family suggests that he try to talk back to the baby when it babbles, and he does, earning himself a smile. After that, he talk with the new baby often, and even ends up "translating" for his family. Helping out brings him into contact with the little one, and they form a bond by the end of this simple, sweet picture book.

It's All About Me!, by Nancy Cote

A very simple rhyming book about a young boy who is "the best," according to his parents. When he hears a baby boy is on the way, though, he is not so thrilled at losing his centre-of-the-universe status. He is not thrilled with the baby - I cry /I'm sad /I get so mad /I wish he'd go away - until the smiling baby starts to grow on him and he starts to take on his role of big brother. When a third is on the way, then, he anticipates how that little brother will feel, and what he will tell him. It is a nice one for a younger child in both its simplicity and in the way it shows how the boy grew from a baby, and then how the new baby behaves once it arrives.

Oonga Boonga, by Frieda Wishinsky, ill. see below

This book is available in two different editions, with different illustrators: Carol Thompson for one, Michael Martchenko for the other. In it, the new baby is disconsolate. The parents and relatives and neighbours have tried everything. And then the big brother comes home and say, simply, "Oonga boonga, Louise." Smiles break out, and he goes out to play until the next crisis. It's a simple story, but one aimed at making the big sibling feel invaluable and helpful, and kids love it. It's not a unique story, of course - Phyllis Root's fantastic What Baby Wants (ill. Jill Barton) uses much the same theme, but allows kids to chime in - it's a favourite of mine, in fact, but it's a less direct telling of the same sort of tale.

Other Great Baby Books

Want some more images of babies and what they do? Maybe in a nice sturdy format for a young one? Penny Gentieu has a number of books (both picture and board) of babies filled with cute photographs of babies doing baby things. Margaret Miller has a similar set of board books about babies. These are great both for siblings and for babies, who love to look at other babies. Also look for Helen Oxenbury's books (also soem in picture, some in board) about what babies do, illustrated in her cute, simple style.

Find these and a stroller-full of other great baby books at your local public library!

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Lovey Love

They love the loveys, don't they? I think a lovey is a wonderful thing - built in comfort and security, easing of transitions, something to tell their troubles too. I encouraged Pumpkinpie's attachment to her loveys, and even bought duplicates in case of loss. Let's face it, loveys are as good for the parent as they are for the child for quite some time.

But then comes trouble. Maybe the lovey gets lost - what to do? Or maybe that sweet toddler gets a little older, and the time has come that you think maybe they should get ready to at least leave the lovey at home, if not detach themselves from the now-worn and grubby object altogether. Or maybe you think the lovey is fine at home, but your now-older child starts wondering if his friends will think it's babyish. It can be an emotional tug-of-war, figuring out how to handle this stuff, how to walk a line between encouraging your child towards growing, respecting their lovey love, soothing fears or sorrow, and figuring out what you think is acceptable in what circumstances.

Of course, as always, I like to share a story about another child and their lovey troubles. Here is a nice little sampling.

Owen, by Kevin Henkes

Owen loved his blankie. It went wherever Owen went. They played together, slept together, and ate together. But the neighbour started to point out that Owen was getting older and ready for school. What to do about the blankie? None of her suggestions turn out very well, nor do they turn Owen off his blankie. It's Owens' mother, who finally finds a way to make blankie into something more acceptable to tote around with him. This story is, of cuorse, cute and funny and rings true, and it also shows a compromise - a way to accept Owen's attachment, but repackage it for his move into the realm of older kids.

No More Blanket for Lambkin!, by Bernette Ford, ill. Sam Williams

Lambkin's friend ever-so-gently, yet firmly, takes lambkin's dirty, much-loved blanket, and plays laundry with it. Once it dries, it is found to be riddled with small holes, so the friend takes it, ties a ribbon and a couple of knots, and transforms the blanket from a tattered cover to a sweet lambie doll much better suited to playing. Not a total removal, but this story gives another option - make it into something else. A pillow, framed art background, stuffed toy? A nice way for a blanket to end up.

Ira Sleeps Over, by Bernard Waber

Ira is a big kid - big enough for a lseepover with his friend Reggie. But Ira still sleeps with his bear. He agonizes over whether to take it or not - will Reggie laugh and call him a baby? His sister thinks so, his parents don't. Turns out in the end, he's not alone in still clinging to an old favourite while trying to pass himself off a more grown up than he might feel sometimes. This story is reassuring to kids who wonder if they are the only one who still like some of the remnanats of early childhood - they are not alone, no matter what the other kids like to pretend. It can do a person good to know that other people worry about this stuff, too. This is a classic - and one of my childhood favourites, too.

Dogger, by Shirley Hughes

Dave's big sister sleeps with lots of stuffed animals, but not Dave. He only loves Dogger. So when Dogger gets lost, then found, then bought by mistake off a rummage sale table, Dave is beside himself. What would he do without Dogger? Luckily, Dave's sister understands, and trades her lovely, newly-won bear to get Dogger back. This book is filled with the love of the young boy, the panic and despair of missing his lovey, and the heartwarming action of his sister. Hughes' trademark details and warm colours bring the whole thing to life perfectly. Just lovely.

Find these and other tales of growing up at your local public library!

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Friends Through Rough Weather

I love a story about friends, and think they are important in helping show children how friends can support each other. But sometimes the waters of friendship grow choppy, and hard to navigate. We talk to our kids, of course, and encourage them to come to us when they have troubles, but it can be good for them to know ahead of time that these storms, too, will probably pass over. These stories show some different scenarios in which friends might find themselves at odds, but come back together in the end.

Sunshine and Storm, by Elisabeth Jones and James Coplestone

Sunshine, and orange cat, and Storm, a black dog, are friends. But when Storm comes in from a wet walk in the rain and shakes himself all over Sunshine, she is none too pleased. And when she hisses at him, he runs away, feeling hurt. They stay apart for a bit, each feeling bad, until they reunite and forgive each other. Sweet without being too lesson-y, this book features unusual and expressive paintings.

Lily's Purple Plastic Purse, by Kevin Henkes

Lily is very excited about her new purse, glasses, and quarters - so excited that she can't keep quiet about them and gets in trouble with her teacher. She loves her teacher, but now she is angry, and she leaves a nasty note in his book bag. She feels terrible afterwards, though, and learns to say sorry, to make it up with a new, nicer note, and to move forward, a little wiser. While not a friend book, I include this to show a similar scenario involving another person who will be prominent in your child's life for a significant portion of it!

Horace and Morris, But Mostly Dolores and

Horace and Morris Join the Chorus (But What About Dolores?), by James Howe, ill. Amy Walrod

In the first book, the boys join a boys-only club, and Dolores decides to join a girls-only club in response. None of them are happy where they are, though, and they miss their adventures together. But one day, Dolores makes a different decision, one that brings them back together, and even adds a couple of new but like-minded mice to their group. The five friend start a new club - where anyone adventurous is welcome. In the second book, the boys get into the choir, but Dolores is left out, and feels it keenly. She writes a note to the music teacher to express herself, and he discovers that she has a talent for lyrics, if not for singing. She is included in the choral performance of her own work, having taken some lessnos from the choir's Moustro. These situations are common childhood troubles - every kid know that being left out feels pretty bad - but come to nice resolutions. There is a great sense of humour in these works (by the author of the Bunnicula series of chapter books), and the illustrations of fun and quirky enough to suit the mice perfectly. Pumpkinpie has been loving these.

Duck & Goose and Duck, Duck, Goose, by Tad Hills

In the introductory book, a favourite of mine, Duck and Goose fall out over the ownership of an egg they find in the park. Neither will relinquish it, so they find themselves stuck together for a while, during which time they grow pretty close, and by the time they figure out the egg is not an egg, they are ready to play together as great friends. The second book finds them navigating the introduction of a third party. The new little duck has Duck pretty excited, and Goose pretty cranky, until she wears thin on Duck, too, who misses Goose and sets off to find him. In the end, the two team up again, bonding over things they enjoy in common. Again, these two books explore some pretty familiar childhood terrain, but show a child that friends can figure out a way to come back together, even if they find themselves feeling angry, left out, or jealous. These books in particular are simple and sweet, yet vibrant and amusing enough to appeal to a nice range of kids.

Find these and other great tales of friendship at your local public library!

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Manners for Minors

If you are like me, you think manners are important. But children are, by definition, uncivilised little beasties, and it is our job to teach them. We teach by example, of course, and by demanding that they follow suit. But what about bringing some into your reading? Showing them that the world at large thinks etiquette counts, too?

Myself, I thoroughly dislike a books that addresses the teaching of children in a didactic tone, an earnest manner. These may be designed to teach, but they are a total turn-off, and I can't imagine the child who would actually want to hear them. Instead, I look for books that teach in a gentler, often sillier, way. Here are a few that I think get the message across without the two-by-four.

How Do Dinosaurs Eat Their Food?
How Do Dinosaurs Play With Their Friends?
How Do Dinosaurs Clean Their Room?
How Do Dinosaurs Say Goodnight?, by Jane Yolen, ill. Mark Teague
This collection of titles is great fun, while teaching children about better behaviour for a variety of situations. Buoyed by Teague's fantastic illustrations (he is one of my favourites), they suggest some crazy, outrageous behaviours, and then go on to remind of what correct conduct would look like. This approach is a savvy one, winning the kids over with the silly (like the one sticking beans up his nose, which I punch up even more with a silly voice for Pumpkinpie), and then coming back down to reality. If, you know, reality involved dinosaurs with human parents eating at the table.

Little Piggy's Books of Manners, by Kathryn Madeline Allen, ill. Nancy Wolff

This little piggy put her playthings away. This little piggy pouted. This little piggy spoke kindly to others. This little piggy shouted. Bold, quirky drawings show a bunch of behaviours in action, as well as the reaction of others around them. I like the jaunty rhyme, the simple telling, and the extremely fun illustrations in this one.

What Do You Say, Dear? by Sesyle joslin, ill. Maurice Sendak

You are picking dandelions and columbines outside the castle. Suddenyl, a fierce dragon appears and blows red smoke at you, but just then a brave knight gallops up and cuts off the dragon's head. What do you say, dear? (Thank you very much.) This and a host of other silly situations teach youngsters the proper words for polite response. As ever, Sendak's illustrations bring a whole new dimension to the already-funny text. Classic.

Mind Your Manners, B.B. Wolf, by Judy Sierra, ill. J. Otto Siebold

B.B. Wolf receives, in the mail, an invitation to tea at the library. His friend helps him brush up on his manners and prepare himself, and he spins the tidbits into a little song he sings on the way. Once there, he is doing well, and even slips into the etiquette section to remind himself of what to say at one point. He charms the librarian and the other attendees, including Bo-Peep, Red Riding Hood, and the Gingerbread Man. Siebold's trademark loopy illustrations (think Olive, the Other Reindeer) keep things crazy and a little confusing, but overall, it's a cute reminder that anyone can learn to be polite, even if it only covers a couple of specific rules. The bigger picture is in the payoff, when he manages to totally revamp his image in one afternoon of good behaviour.

I Want My Dinner, by Tony Ross

The Little Princess (yes, the one from the TV show) wants things. But she can't have them without a please. Once she absorbs this lesson, she turns around and teaches it to a beastie, topping it off by requesting a thank you. It's a simple book, and shows her learning just as most kids do - by not getting what she's after until she remembers to add a please. Even royalty is obliged to have manners!

Are You Going To Be Good?, by Cari Best, ill. G. Brian Karas.

Older kids will identify with this one if they have ever been invited to a grownup party. Robert's enthusiasm rides up and down as he is dressed up (good), instructed on how to behave (boring), faced with weird food (gross), told "Don't do that!" innumerable times as he tries to entertain himself (frustrating), and gets to dance with his grandma (super-fantastic). Everything here rings perfectly true to how tiresome a grownup party can be for a kid, but also how special some moments can be. I would suggest this for a kid of 5-10 years old who has gone to these parties or will be soon.

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Scary Monsters, Super Creeps

My daughter is beginning to worry about monsters and nightmares and dragons and other fear-inducing creatures of the night. It's the age - imagination blooms and magical thinking takes hold about three, and monsters are as much a part of that as dressup. But perhaps they might feel better with a few stories about other kids with the same troubles, and they might even get a few suggestions about how to deal. Try these:

Go Away Big Green Monster!, by Ed Emberley

This book breaks down the big green monster - literally - telling each part to go away, one at a time, until he is gone. Also a cute way to introduce colours of face parts, this gives kids a great tool for banishing the spooky things that inhabit their mind's eye. I would give this warning - apparently, it helps to warm the kid up a bit and introduce it as silly, or show a page with only a partial face and have them guess, because Pumpkinpie figured out it was a monster book as a toddler, and won't let me open it, even two years later. Yeesh.

The Nightmare In My Closet and

The Alligator Under My Bed, by Mercer Mayer

The Nightmare was a massive hit back in the day, and remains a great classic, even spawning a short movie, while the sequel, Alligator, takes on another popular fear among the Very Small. The nightmare begins with a spooky monster in the closet and a boy barracading himself in his bed, with blanket, pop gun, and helmet for protection. As it turns out when he decides to take on the monster and shoots it with his pop gun, the monster is scared, and starts crying. So the boy tucks him into his own bed, and makes friends with his own haint. This was a favourite of mine as a kid, in fact, and I introduced it to Pumpkinpie this weekend in the interests of market research. She was edging away at first, worried about the monster, but I kept reading, and as soon as she heard the monster crying, she was intrigued, and scooted back over to see what was going on. She loved it, and now we are playing mommy and baby nightmare. Crazy kid.

Leonardo, the Terrible Monster, by Mo Willems

Leonardo was a terrible monster. He never scared anyone. He thought he scared Sam, specially selected for his skittishness, but it turned out he was just unhappy. So Leonardo decided that if he was a terrible monster, perhaps he could try being a great friend, instead. Cute and non-threatening, this is another winner from kidlit's current darling (well-deserved), though a lesser-known offering. Easily survived the Skittish Pumpkinipe test.

Milo Mouse and the Scary Monster, Louis Baum, ill. Sue Hellard

This boko is a gentler tale about a little mouse who night after night dreams of a horrible creature chasing him. Each night he receives another tip on how to get a good sleep, but none seem to help. Instead, he finds a "happy place" and one night, he remembers it in his dream, waking up. What he discovers is that a tiny little mouse keeps disturbing his sleep, wanting to play. It's a little cute, perhaps, but it might be a better direction for a kid ilke mine, who doesn't even want to open the green monster book above. Sigh.

Find these and other books for facing your fears at your local public library!

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Imaginary Friends

Like Calvin has Hobbes, children sometimes have imaginary friends. It can freak parents out, a child talking about someone who isn't there, about things their "friend" said, because let's face it - we want our children to have imagination, but where is the line between that and, say, voices? Relax, it's pretty common. And a helpful tool for them, too - I had imaginary friends to play games with, as an only child, and I turned out okay (hush up, you over there!).

But how do we handle it? Indulge them? Ignore it? Tell them not to be silly? How about asking them to let us in on their imaginary world, so we can get a sense of what's going on in there? After all, their minds are pretty interesting. You will, no doubt, be shocked to hear I have a few stories about imaginary friends that might be nice shared reading, but also just might open up the discussion for you.

Jessica, by Kevin Henkes

(Hey, I haven't had a Kevin Henkes on here for a while, plus, it's a good one about Just This Thing. Be quiet. Or should I say - Shhh!) Ruthie Simms has a best friend Jessica. She may be imaginary, but she's a terrific companion (and occasional scapegoat). Even though Ruthie's parents insist she's not real, she is to Ruthie. And so she goes to kindergarten with her, where Ruthie is suddenly faced with a dilemma. The problem is solved, however, when the real live girl in front of her introduces herself - as Jessica. And now she really does have a best friend.

My Dinosaur, by Mark Alan Weatherby

A young girl waits for her dinosaur at night and has a wild and magical romp through the forest, dipping into the river, reaching past the treetops, and playing games of hide-and-seek. As day breaks, she returns to bed, and morning finds her yawning over her Cheerios. The pictures in this book are just wonderful, suffused with moonlight, the dinosaur just gentle enough not to frighten, and the girl's face alive with joy.

Clara and Asha, by Eric Rohmann

Clara's imaginary friend Asha plays with her in a range of scenarios, including in the bathtub, at Hallowe'en, and at her tea parties. She is just the friend a girl needs, though we learn at the end that she is not Asha's only pretend friend... Gorgeously illustrated and sweetly low-key in tone.

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Bullies, Bossies, and Other Pests

It surprising to parents of three-year-olds that bullying and bossing and social games start early. Preschoolers are beginning to navigate this stuff, even before they get to kindergarten, and it can be painful to watch, even in the early stages. There is, however, more and more interest and awareness around bullying now than ever before, and with that comes a handful of picture books. Myself, I look for light-hearted, story-based, not-too-earnest ways of talking about bullying and being a good friend. These stories really don't talk in a direct way about what bullying is and how to deal with it, but rather offer a little tale, and in reading, I take the opportunity to comment on what is happening and ask questions of Pumpkinpie. "How do you think she feels right now?" "What do you think she could do?" Talking early and often is a great way to start the discussion and keep it going, and a book is always a nice, non-threatening place to begin.

This crop should open discussion with kids who still enjoy picture books, say from ages 3 to 8 or so, pretty easily. For early readers (about grades 2-3) who may want to read books on this theme by themselves, try simple chapter books Super Emma by Sally Warner or Jake Drake, Bully Buster, by Andrew Clements. (For more serious cases, though, there are books in the parenting section to help parents deal with the situation, especially for parents of older children, who may be facing more extreme degrees of bullying.)

Clara and The Bossy, by Ruth Ohi

Clara is happy to have a new friend, until Madison begins to criticize everything she does, and hurts another kid's feelings. She thinks about this one night, and decides that she needs to be herself more than she needs one more friend. She goes her own way, and soon enough, Madison follows, reformed.

A Weekend With Wendell, by Kevin Henkes

When Wendell shows up and spends the weekend terrorizing Sophie, she is at her wit's end. Finally, antagonism turns to friendship after Sophie gives him a taste of his own medicine. Once she gets her own back, the two find themselves having a great time together, and a whole new dynamic is in place.

Hooway for Wodney Wat, by Helen Lester, ill. Lynn Munsinger

The new rodent in class, Camilla Capybara is horrible. A know-it-all and a bully, she intimidates every other creature in class. When Rodney, who cannot say his R's, has to take a turn leading Simon Says, he totally defeats camilla, who doesn't understand his directions, not knowing about his speech. In the end, she disappears into the sunset, going "west" (instead of going to rest). What I love in particular about this book is that his weakness, for which he was teased at first, is the thing that makes him a hero to the others in the end, and his victory is not born of any bad behaviour on his part. It is a little simple, of course, and doesn't offer a solution per se, but it is nice for the underdog to be a hero and show her up.

Goggles, by Ezra Jack Keats

Proving that bullying is certainly nothing new, this classic title from Keats shows two young boys tricking a groups of bigger boys to avoid them when the bigger boys are picking on them. Features Keats' trademark urban setting and Peter, his frequent main character.

Is It Because?, by Tony Ross

One that promotes thinking about the root of bullying, and why the bully acts as he does. It is a tiny bit silly, to encourage a laugh and lighten the mood as you talk about something frightening. This encouraging empathy is a nice approach, though I think a child might want it paired with a book where the underdog triumphs, as well, to give a little lift of spirits and so that all the attention is not on the attention-seeking bully, as usual.

Duck, Duck, Goose, by Tad Hills

When Thistle, a new duck, moves into the neighbourhood, Duck is pretty excited - until he and Goose try to play with Thistle and discover that Thistle is pushy and bossy and overly competitive and in general, no fun to play with. While Goose tries to be a good sport for a while, eventually he and Duck give up, and fool the little duck into napping while they play their own games. (This is a followup to Duck & Goose, one of my favourite picture books of last year's crop.)

Ker-Splash!, by George O'Connor

This junior graphic book makes liberal use of the comic format and the superhero fantasies of the young to take on the topic of bullying. Set at the beach, a pair of kids pick on the younger brother of one of them, and then find themselves the target of a bigger bully. Seeing the parallel, they apologize the the little guy, and the three of them team up to defeat the big boy by distraction and teamwork. While the bully is avoided and doesn't get official comeuppance, the crab inching towards his sand-seated bottom in the last frame Delivers a snide and satisfying snicker.

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Swimming Upstream with Floaties

Some parents want to do things a different way, a way that feels more like them. Not with an OB and an epi and maybe a c-section, but with a home birth, perhaps. Some parents want not a bottle, but a breast. And sometimes, it can feel like swimming upstream, because while breastfeeding is more and more widely promoted and supported, it isn't considered mainstream by everyone just yet. So how do you talk about these things with your child, especially if you have a new one coming along? How do they see their family reflected in the picture books they read, if most don't show things this way? Indeed, most books don't really address these things one way or another, but I have tripped across a couple of books that don't skip over this stuff, and these can be used as a lovely support in your inevitable discussions to come. It's rare, still, to be sure, but here is a start.

Mama's Milk, by Michael Elsohn Ross, ill. Ashley Wolff

This gentle rhyming book shows mothers feeding their child as a natural thing, and one of the ways in which she both nourishes and nurtures. Many animals are shown in their nest and burrows as well as dining on the go, and families are shown feeding infants in cozy chairs, in bed, and on a park bench. Babywearers might also enjoy seeing one mother carrying her wee one in a sling, while I particularly enjoyed the mother asleep in a chair as her babe nursed. The classic patterned tale of The New Baby Calf (by Edith Newlin Chase, ill. Barbara Reid) also talks about how the baby calf drinks from his mother and grows fat, and though it does not talk about people, it could be a nice supplement to this.

Everywhere Babies, by Susan Meyers, ill. Marla Frazee

This book does not directly address any particular parenting technique, dilemma, or style, but I incude it rather for its message-free inclusiveness. This book is a cute and jaunty rhyme, illustrated to fun effect by the incomparable Frazee's detailed drawings. In it, readers are shown the many ways that babies eat, crawl, are carried and rocked and dressed, and more. What I love is that no judgment is made on how babies are fed, simply noting that they are fed "by bottle, by breast, with cups, and with spoons." Similarly, babies are carried not only in strollers, but also in slings and on shoulders. One of my favourite gifts for new moms, I might add.

Welcome With Love, by Jenni Overend, ill. Julie Vivas

This is the only story book I've seen that even comes close to talking about home birth, let alone with illustrations of a birth. These are not photos, nor are they overly graphic, but they are enough to help prepare a sibling who might attend a birth, as they do depict some of what a child might see if they were present. The family is preparing for the birth and waiting for the arrival of their midwife at the beginning of the book. The child narrator talks about the preparations and some of the midwife's equipment, as well as the mother's labouring and the emotions of the moment. After the birth, the mom is tucked into bed and puts the new babe to her breast while the placenta is delivered and the cord cut, and then the whole family sleeps together in the warm light of the fireplace. It's a lovely book, really, and one I would recommend as good preparation for anyone who might be considering sharing a birth experience with a sibling or having a child at home.

These and many non-fiction titles on parenting topics can be found at your local library!

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.

Feelings, Nothing More Than Feelings

Emotions are a tough thing to explain sometimes, being so very intangible. An illustration of facial expression certainly helps, as do examples of when you might feel a certain way. These books have a few novel ways to address the discussion, and help children learn to identify and name their feelings.

My Many-Coloured Days, by Dr. Seuss, ill. Steve Johnson and Lou Fancher

This book uses the idea of feeling like different animals and colours to talk about emotions, and the swirling paintings carry the mood even further. Example: When my days are happy pink, it's great to jump and just not think! He even mentions "mixed-up days" when a child might not know what they feel, which I haven't seen elsewhere. In the end though, the book reassures that no matter what our mood, we go back to being ourselves.

Walter Was Worried, by Laura Vaccaro Seeger

This book uses a few devices to help bring forth and express different feelings. Each child has a different reaction to different types of weather, and both the weather and the face are illustrated. The fact that the letters of the emotion are painted into the form of the face is a bit gimmicky, but can be totally overlooked unless you have one of those children who likes to find things in pictures (as Pumpkinpie does). Example: Walter was worried when the sky grew dark. This book goes through a nice range of emotions as the weather grows first wilder, then clears up, and the chldren react accordingly.

How Are You Peeling?: Foods with Moods, by Saxton Freymann and Joost Elffers

Easily dismissed as a novelty item, I actually quite like this book, in which fruit and veg are turned into creatures with extremely communicative faces. I like the simplicity of the text, and the clarity of the facial expressions, and I like that the tone is light and there is some giggle factor. It's a great way to get kids trying out making those faces themselves, and seeing what they look like on you. The physicality of that exercise can really help make the connection between the face and the feeling.

Today I Feel Silly & Other Moods That Make My Day, by Jamie Lee Curtis, ill. Laura Cornell

As I've written before, Curtis is one of the celeb authors that gets it right for kids, and this book is a fun one. What I like most about it is that each mood - and there is a wide range - is illustrated with a jaunty rhyme about some of the things that might help create that mood or some of the kinds of reactions a kid might have while feeling that way.

Sometimes I Feel Awful, by Joan Singleton Prestine, ill. Virginia Kylberg

This story of a crummy day is told by a young girl who has trouble expressing her feelings. As she looks back on how her day went from good to bad to worse, she identifies in each episode what made her feel bad, how she reacted, and what she could have said to make the person involved understand her. It is a bit on the heavy-handed side in terms of the reptitive message that she was not making herself understood, something I normally hate in a picture book. In this case, though, I think it does something useful and tricky - models how a child might put feelings into words. This skill is so useful, I give the message-y aspect a pass here. (Also, I found myself extra touched by the expressiveness of the girl's face, as she looks quite a lot like my Pumkinpie. Aww.)

Sometimes I Feel Like a Mouse, by Jeanne Modesitt, ill. Robin Spowart

This simple book features a child noting how sometimes they feel like different animals, and then identifying the feeling. Sometimes I feel like a mouse hiding, Shy. The paintings in the books are soft-edged, boldly coloured, and nicely evocative.

Lots of Feelings, by Shelley Rotner

This book features Rotner's signature sunlit, bright photos, and has children showing the faces associated with a nice variety of feelings, some of which I have not seen in other books. There is a nice variety of faces, too, which I appreciate, though some of the faces look quite like the child is approximating, and the emotions then are not quite as clear. Mostly though, this is a nice one for teaching children about expression and how it reflects feelings.

Look for these and other books about feelings at your local library!

Originally posted on MommyBlogsToronto/Better Than a Playdate.